Being Clingy In A Relationship – H&S Love Affair
7 Signs You’re Being Clingy & How To Stop!
The word ‘clingy’ synonymous with ‘anxious attachment’ in a relationship, refers to being needy and overly dependent on your partner. This behaviour of wanting constant reassurance from your partner or craving constant attention from your partner usually stems from an individual’s unmet emotional, physical or mental needs & is extremely unattractive and can also result in losing the one you love as you don’t even realize how your partner views and feels about your clinginess.
7 Signs Of Clingy Behaviour-
1. You Want Reassurance Over & Over Again- If you are constantly seeking reassurance of your partner’s feelings for you and still doubt them for reassuring you, then you could be clingy. Some of the common questions a clingy person may ask are: Do you love me? Are you sure? You don’t love me, show me you do? Usually, these questions are repeated and could be brought up every few weeks, or could lead to wanting a commitment for example a promise to marry even when it may be too early in the relationship.
2. Waiting Anxiously For Communication Through Texts, Calls- Being constantly worried about where your partner is, what he/she may be doing during the day & working yourself into a panic when they don’t respond to a text or call, is a sign of clinginess.
3. Constantly Stalking Your Partner- This overbearing behaviour of wanting to stalk your partner’s social media, checking on their phone without their permission is another sign of being clingy.
4. Ignoring Yourself For Your Partner- Changing or adjusting yourself to fit what you think your partner wants and losing your identity in the process as you believe you are not good enough or worthy of love is another sign of clinginess. This could involve spending time pleasing your partner, and not spending time on what you enjoyed doing, be it with friends or a hobby.
5. Lack Of Space In Your Relationship- Wanting to constantly be close to your partner through cuddles or kisses, for example, can be overwhelming and suffocating for your partner. So if you don’t give physical space and constantly hover around your partner this is literally being clingy.
6. Being Insecure- Feeling threatened by your partner’s friends or co-workers of the opposite sex is another sign that indicates you could be clingy.
7. Becoming Controlling- If you feel you have complete right over your partner’s life and feel the urge to dictate his/her life, then this is a trait of a clingy person.
How To Stop Being Clingy?
Being clingy in a relationship is unhealthy. In order to stop being clingy here’s what you need to do:
1. Take Charge Of Your Anxiety- Be aware and work through managing your anxiety on your own. Try to believe your partner when they reassure you, ask questions of what you need in the relationship for example to start a healthy relationship.
2. Talk To Your Partner- Learn from your partner about how your actions make them feel. This will help you make the necessary changes in order to maintain healthy interactions.
3. Take Some ‘ME’ Time Out- Focus on yourself, get into a new or an old hobby, meet with friends and do things you like to do without your partner. Give yourself some breathing space as this will help strengthen your relationship.
4. Get Professional Help- Having anxiety can be very uncomfortable to deal with. If your clinginess stems from fears of abandonment then it may be advisable to seek help as a therapist will guide you on how to manage your attachments and help you strengthen your relationship.