The Fear Of Falling In Love – H&S Love Affair

Philophobia: The Extreme Fear Of Falling In Love

Falling in love can be one of the most beautiful and exhilarating experiences of life. However, an extreme fear of ‘falling in love’ also known as philophobia is a real thing! Philophobia can be defined as overwhelming & unreasonable fear of falling in love or developing and maintaining an emotional connection with another person & may result in social isolation, substance abuse, or depression if left untreated. So if you or someone you know is philophobic, keep reading to learn everything you need to know, from what causes it to how you can overcome it.

Risk Factors/Causes-

It is thought that most people with a traumatic experience in their past relationship have the tendency to be philophobic. An example of this could be someone who has been hurt badly by an ex-lover and doesn’t want to risk taking another chance or a child who has been abandoned may not want to have a relationship as an adult due to the fear of abandonment. Usually the ‘fear’ is what causes the person to stay away to avoid the hurt & rejection. The more the person then avoids due to this ‘fear’ the more the ‘fear’ increases  causing the person to be phiolphobic.

Signs/Symptoms-

This differs from person to person, however, some symptoms & signs may include feeling anxious constantly in a relationship, not having an intimate relationship, having anxiety or panic attacks whilst in a relationship, having fast heart rate and shallow breathing.

In more extreme cases or if left untreated, one may have an increased risk of developing depression, severe anxiety, substance abuse and even suicidal ideations.

Treatment-

The treatment options vary depending on the severity, and it could include medication, therapy or counselling, lifestyle changes or a combination of all of the above.

THERAPY OR COUNSELLING- You will work with a professional counsellor or therapist who will try to identify the cause and help you manage your fear through either exercises, or depending on the severity, use CBT Cognitive behavioural therapy to pick & correct the thought patterns, habits, beliefs and reactions contributing to this fear. Systemic desensitization therapy known as counterconditioning may also be used, where you will be slowly exposed to the idea of falling in love to desensitize you to the fear. In some instances, hypnotherapy can also be suggested, where guided meditation is used to help you overcome the fear.

MEDICATIONS- An antidepressant or antianxiety medications may be prescribed by the doctor if there are other diagnosable mental health disorders. Remember, usually therapy and medications go hand in hand when treating,

LIFESTYLE CHANGES- Exercise, relaxation techniques, mindfulness and other strategies may be advised by the health professional to tackle philophobia.

How To Support Someone With Philophobia-

If a person dear to you has philophobia you can do these to help them:

1. First, you need to understand and accept that this is a serious fear.
2. Never pressure or force a philophobic person to do something they’re not comfortable with, as it makes it worse.
3. If you know they’re struggling, encourage them to seek professional help and guidance.
4. If you want to help or support, ask them how.