How To Tackle Issues As Parents, During COVID-19 Lockdown

Parenting is a 24/7 job that has no breaks or vacays. If you are a parent you know this is a full-time unpaid job that needs to be done, as the tiny humans, we called children, depend on adults for everything. The only break parents rely are on when kids are at school or on a playdate but given the current lockdown situation and since social distancing has been put into place, with the closing of schools etc parenting has now become an even more tedious task. Imagine having one kid and you are struggling, now think of parents with more than one child? Then think of that one hyperactive child versus the quiet angels. Whether one or many it doesn’t matter if you are going to be stuck indoors with little humans, you need to be a little better equipped to maintain a somewhat harmonious environment.

So how can parents manage their child/children’s difficult behaviour during these difficult times?

1. First & Foremost CONTROL What Is Controllable: Control YOUR REACTIONS & YOURSELF. Remember as parents you are going to be faced with unavoidable circumstances and situations. Your reaction to that is important. If you are consistent and don’t react or overreact with harsh words or punishments, half the battle has been won!

2. WALK AWAY: Most of the time you get tempted to intervene during a tantrum or a fight. The best thing is to walk away and observe from a distance, just to make sure there is no serious damage being done. If your child has broken a rule, give the consequence whatever was set out, and walk away. Remember even as adults when you are in an argument and you walk away the other person is left powerless, the same tactic works on kids. By arguing back you are just falling in the trap, but when you walk away, you let your child know that you have zero tolerance on backtalking and disrespect.

3. Be the ROLE MODEL: Remember, if you want your child to be calm and composed, likewise you need to do the same. Children mirror their parents and if you are going to be stressed and abusive your child too is going to pick the same. If you handle a situation calmly the child too will learn to do the same. Good behaviour is only possible if you not only preach but also practice it.

4. Handle One Issue At A Time: Remember, yes parents are multitaskers but when it comes to issues it’s best to tackle them one at a time. Stay focussed and prioritize on the important issue at hand. No one’s perfect and children are not an exception to that!

5. Lower Those Expectations!: Parenting is not supposed to be rigid at all times and you need to let loose and be okay being ‘Good Enough’ as supposed to ‘Perfect’ parents. If you lower your expectations and start accepting yourselves as doing a good job and stop comparing yourselves or your kids or your lives to your neighbours or others you will be satisfied with yourself and your kids. Every family has its own struggles and their struggles may be different from yours but you need to realise there’s nothing like perfect! What may be working for you and your children may not necessarily be working for others. So just focus on your child/children and if you fail don’t be harsh on yourself, improve yourself. You may not always walk away for example and get dragged into an argument with your child, and that’s your learning curve so that next time when you are encountered with a similar situation you are better equipped to handle it.

6. Most Importantly Go Easy On Yourself & Focus On Self-Care: Even if it’s a few minutes a day for yourself, do it! Whether it’s doing meditation or taking a walk, whatever it is you need to relax. Taking a small break every now and then is important for your mental health, especially during these hard times, all parents should make self-care a part of the daily routine.

7. Breathe In, Breathe Out & BE PATIENT: Any change takes time as change is a process, not something that happens overnight. If you want your child to be disciplined and act appropriately stick to the routine of walking away, controlling your behaviour and reactions, practising before preaching etc & you are surely going to see that desired change in your child/children. It’s all about being patient. Remember change begins with yourself and this again all comes down to how you react to your child.

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