Rejection! – Positive Reflection Of The Week
Dealing With Rejection! – An Article by Shahwana
Rejection, it’s hard part of life, however, time to time, we face situations where we need to face this kind of matter. Now when we are rejected, we feel hurt, and that’s perfectly OK as humans, however, many of us take to a higher level of causing more injury to ourselves than the episode itself. We feel unworthy, we feel we are not good enough. Many people take this as deep pain which results in wounds that can create Mental Health illness, and even lead to desperation stage where we want to keep wanting the person to approve us. This can be related to any type of relationships.
Below are some ideas on how to deal with the situation, but the first step is to understand that you are important and that you are special, & not to keep seeing yourself with the eyes of others, seeking approval.
DON’T INSULT THEM
This probably sounds obvious, right? Apparently not. We know not everyone does it, but there is a small group of people who sadly will resort to petty name-calling after they’ve not got the answer they wanted. You can’t be complementing the person you fancy one minute and then completely change your mind because of the words ‘no, thanks’. All they’ve said is no; it doesn’t mean it’s personal and it doesn’t mean you necessarily did anything wrong. Sometimes it’s something you can’t control at all.
DO ACCEPT THE REJECTION
The only way you’ll get over rejection is by accepting it. When you’re told the news, it might hurt, it might piss you off, and those are all feelings you’re allowed to have. Take a couple seconds if you need to, but make sure you’re mature and calm in your response. Chances are, they would have been nervous about telling you, so try to tell them not to worry. Be honest with them about enjoying your time with them – which leads nicely into our next point.
DO BE HONEST
Just be honest with yourself about how you feel. Acknowledge those feelings and make sure you handle them correctly. Don’t let your feelings manifest itself into anger over something so little. If you do want to let them know your feelings, do so honestly and calmly. Nobody wants their texts to end up with a Bye, or as a BuzzFeed article on how not to respond to rejection. We get that it’s hurtful sometimes, but remember it’s not their fault and you shouldn’t be taking it out on them.
DON’T TRY TO CHANGE THEIR MIND
A thought-out and intense message asking them to reconsider isn’t going to help your cause, sadly. We’ve all been there thinking ‘this text to the ex is a really great idea’ but, really, we all know better than that. Although they may be the only person you want to be with right now, in the long run you’ll realize no one deserves to be with someone that doesn’t want to be with them. You deserve better than that, too.
DON’T RULE OUT FRIENDSHIP
There’s no reason that if you get on before you ask the question, then you’ll get on after the question. As long as you don’t make a big problem about it and deal with the rejection maturely, then this person can still be in your life if they want to be. Sometimes, it can be the start of a really good friendship, so don’t go cutting any ties because it didn’t work out romantically.
DO REMEMBER THAT THEY DON’T OWE YOU ANYTHING
There’s a correct way to find out why you’ve been rejected if that’s what you’re wanting from the situation. Just accept the ‘no’, phrase the question in a mature and calm way and, if they don’t want to give you that answer, try not to force it out of them – they don’t have to tell you.
Just remember you are important, there are lessons to be learnt from every situation we face. Be brave, love yourself and don’t cause injury to yourself because of actions others are taking.
Shahwana Khanam – Pranic Healer
