Parenting As A Team Helps Raise A Healthy, Happy & Successful Child!

Raising your child as a team is when both you and your partner work together by agreeing on making decisions and supporting your child together. This way you and your partner feel more supported as you have a common goal in mind of raising a healthy, happy and successful child. This, however, doesn’t mean that you and your partner will never disagree, as you are two different individuals and are entitled to your different thoughts or opinions on raising your child. However, team parenting is all about reaching a common ground and it’s all about how you handle your disagreements together. It’s all about teamwork and managing your child’s bedtimes, meals, discipline amidst sharing the household chores, income etc. Parenting as a team is also about caring not just for your child but for each other because remember how you interact with your partner has a huge influence on your child. If you work as a team together your child not only feels safe and happy but also learns the importance of ‘respectful’ communication and healthy relationships, which is key for their emotional growth and development. Parenting together as a team also has a positive impact on you and your partner as it makes you feel happy, content and confident with your partner, making the parenting journey a lot easier and more fun.

1. Communication Is Key- Effective & positive communication is important. Communicate in ways that help you connect & strengthen your relationship. But for this, you need to first understand, respect, and accept each other’s ideas or values regarding parenting and this means living with and valuing each other’s differences. You and your partner may have different family values for example that might have an impact on a parenting method you may want to apply. Discuss and try to resolve your differences or disagreements in a collaborative and positive way and when you are stuck or can’t work through a certain issue, search for new and creative solutions. Agree on daily routines such as bedtime, meal plans, screen times, etc. Always discuss your parenting issues openly when you are calm and collected and not when you both are not in a good mood.

2. Back Each Other Up- Even if you are not happy with the way your partner is handling a situation, you still act as a team and back them up at that moment. If one says ‘No’ stick to the decision at that moment. Never criticise, belittle or blame your partner in front of your child. Even after the situation has passed, be kind and use positive criticism to point out the error. Remember parenting should be in a consistent and supportive way. Mistakes are bound to happen but it’s all about how you as a team tackle those mistakes.

3. Be Reasonable Yet Flexible & Compromise Where Necessary- Remember parenting is about patience, and it requires you to be flexible both in your ‘parenthood’ expectations as well as how you parent. So what is important to you when it comes to parenting? Are please and thank you important to your values or is it an absolute must to restrict screen time? What are the things you are not willing to negotiate about versus the things you are willing to negotiate about? Discuss them with each other before you implicate a certain rule for example that your partner may not be happy about. Be reasonable and accepting of each other’s thoughts/values and compromise when possible.

4. When You Don’t See Eye To Eye Get Help- Sometimes you may get preoccupied with the whole parenthood thing and this may cause stress on your personal relationship with your partner. It can be easy to ignore your own relationship as you focus wholly on parenting but it’s important to keep the balance. Your relationship challenges are also important and working through them will only help you to work better as a team. Don’t ignore your relationship with yourself and your partner as it’s important to keep a balance for a healthy relationship and partnership. If you are however stuck and can’t seem to work through your agreements, seek help it could be from a counselor, professional parenting educator, etc.

Remember, parenting as a team involves day-to-day problem solving, management of conflicts, effective communication, backing up one another and most of all be accepting of each other’s values and indifferences. Raising your child as a team is not only good for you but most importantly good for your child. It’s imperative for kids especially the younger ones, to see their parents together working as a harmonious team. Your stable relationship makes them feel safe, happy, and confident and this helps them grow emotionally and keeps them healthy mentally and physically.